2 out of 5

Directed by: Christian James

The face of horror to come…!  Or something.  I get what ‘Stalled’ was going for.  The problem is – it’s hard to do this kind of low budget horror with a truly inspired sensibility nowadays, when references and awareness are only an internet search / torrent download away.  There’s no Blockbuster rental to track down anymore, no “saw it late one night at a friend’s house” unearthed cult classic.  In other words: ‘Stalled’ is not ‘Dead Alive.’  It touches on it at points, with its sloppy gushing comical gore and mumbling accented dialogue, but Dan Palmer’s script can hardly get through a half hour before tedium sets in, much less ninety minutes.  One-location flicks – Buried being the prime example of the style done right – must find unique ways of not only telling their story from an isolated location, but keeping the events believably engaging.  ‘Stalled’ plods a bit through its setup of janitor/maintenance man W.C. wandering into the women’s restroom at work, hiding away in the stall when some ladies arrive, but it admittedly hits a note of frenzy for the first few minutes after W.C. finds himself sequestered to the stall when a zombie outbreak just sorta’ happens.  He scurries to make his hidey-hole safe and its a fun moment of resourcefulness and low-budget fun.  And then: problem solved.  Instead of really escalating events, Palmer and director James choose to just tack on extras – go find your phone!, there’s someone else alive in here!, try to hit the firealarm!, and etc., not to mention a boring MacGuffin of a toolbox full of money.  The reason these elements seem to drag instead of excite is because ‘Stalled’ is lacking the core of insanity that drove our favorite horror flicks, instead opting to insert a “plot” (that MacGuffin, the someone else alive) that’s never really too compelling or interesting because the characters aren’t too compelling or interesting… and resolves matters somewhat insultingly and pat for the roundabout way it tells its story.  While the final escape sequence has a nice logical fake-out, the actual ‘climax’ isn’t overdone enough to sell its silliness – underlining that ‘Stalled’ seems to buy a bit too much into its story.  Which is too bad, because there was definitely a fun short film in here, and Christian James does a commendable job with limited resources to effect his restroom as a zombie jam-packed space, but the script needs to excise its cleverness padding and just dig down deep for the rash inspiration that’s birthed many-a-classic.