4 out of 5

Directed by: Martin Wood

Woe to me for giving a positive review to something that stems from the pen of True Blood-er Charlaine Harris (I have irrational dislike for her without having read any of her books or watched True Blood.  Go me!).  Also, maybe woe to me for finding out that Hallmark caters to lonely spinsters like m’self with countless mystery series, and that two of them somehow feature ex-Full House-ers.  Not that Candace Cameron Bure is exactly why I’m here; I never had a crush or anything.  But I did have a crush on her husband Pavel Bure, in the way my adolescent mind understood crushes, which is to say not at all.  I had no idea what he looked like, really, or what he did besides play hockey, but my dad associated me with him (I think) due to my “speed” while playing baseball (I am not fast nor a good baseball player, hence the quotes; those were dad goggles through which my skills were viewed), and so I started collecting his sports cards, seeking Pop Pop’s approval.  (I never, ever called him Pop Pop.)  While this is maybe all common enough kid logic, I think it’s also somehow evidence of how I’ve wound up sitting here alone, very literally disgusted by human contact and muttering things to myself like “boobs are stupid.”  Is… is this helpful to this review?

Anyhow, Mrs. Bure, my point here is that you shouldn’t get a big head from my fandom: if not for your last name, I wouldn’t be here!  Harumph and whatnot!

…But I’m glad I’m here.  I mean, Aurora Teargarden, with its TV-G rating, absolutely follows every generic hour-and-a-half amateur sleuth trope you can name, with nitpicking friends and over-eager confidants and love interests who are always second to the mystery and It’s Him! Now It’s Him! double-backs and difficult officials and last minute doubts and… on and on.  And it’s Hallmark, so we go to church.  But at least, at this point (as other Teargarden movie adaptations are due), the moralizing is kept very much to a minimum.  So what elevates this above standard TV?  Well: Bure’s well-learned mug-for-the-camera era of acting has paid off in a very relaxed, believable on-screen presence.  She’s absolutely the highlight amongst a cast that, on the fringes of its surprisingly large list, delivers its dialogue like wooden gorillas, and I’m sorta realizing that makes her sound like the only the best out of the bad, but I more mean to say that she’s always fun to watch on screen, her quizzical glances and expressions the perfect balance of bravado and recognizability.  Hallmark shows lean toward a sort of overblown innocence, but Cameron immediately pulls us out of that dimness and gives her moments (which are, thankfully, most of the movie) a nice sense of energy and eagerness.

Martin Wood’s directing is an amazing assist, the camera cool and collected but constantly moving to reframe the scenes.  It’s a surprising amount of involvement for a TV movie, and especially one aimed at an armchair, cat-owning crowd, but it’s notable at every moment without it being distracting or noxious to that same crowd.  This is matched by the wonderfully compelling score by Lawrence Shragge.  Their contributions go a long, long way toward making the movie feel and look fun.

Aurora Teargarden runs a “real crime” club.  She stumbles across a skull hidden in a recently departed friend’s home, which allows her to stumble across a body.  Foul play is suspected.  For plot reasons, she withholds the skull while the police investigate the body, giving herself a few days to finger the perpetrator of the crime while trying to keep herself off of the ‘obstruction of justice’ list.  You know the vibe.  It’s Columbo stuff, and if that’s your bag and you don’t mind the ‘probably meant for a female viewership’ leaning of things, Candance Cameron Bure’s energetic performance and a surprisingly adept production mark this TV movie as higher quality than the norm.