1 gibble out of 5

Director: Roland Emmerich

Nothing happens in this movie. Don’t fool yourself. I wasn’t expecting much from Mr. Emmerich, but this was low. At least find a way to blow some things up. Instead, it rattles down to one last battle at the end that’s very much a letdown. And the sort of cool tiger or whatever that’s stalking the guy on the poster? Just makes a cameo. After that scene is over, you’re just sort of like… That’s it. Yes. That is it. For the entire movie. And it’s a good thing we didn’t have movies back in 10,000 BC, because none of these cavemen know how to act.