2 gibbles out of 5

Directors: various, too many to name

This is “New York, I Love You” from people that have seen films about New York and lived here with money for a couple years.

Several vignettes that are loosely tied only in the sense that characters pass by one another here and there, this film, in my eyes, was meant to be a glance into possible everyday highs and lows of the city. But – as a friend mentioned after seeing the film – this was an amazingly white New York. Now I wasn’t expecting down and dirty, but only one story rang true out of all of these – an unfulfilled romance between two people who never really get to talk and speak different languages. The ten minutes taken for that story define what short films should be about.

The rest? There’s a story about being slutty in a bar, about being a pickpocket, about being a down-and-out soundtrack composer, a Jewish wife, an old couple… Some of these are cute, but none made a lasting impression. And while there are some bits that try to mention how much of a melting pot NY can be, even the ethnic actors in the film seemed pretty gentrified. This was a friendly taste of what people want New York to be, directed by a lot of foreigners.

And why the hell they didn’t cast someone of real foreign descent and instead cast Shia Lebouff for the most boring segment of this film, I have no idea. Not horrible, just not NY, even the modern Disney version of it. Unless, maybe, you have enough time and money to live these frilly lives the characters lead, OR try to live your life like a 90s MTV drama, OR are Brett Ratner. (Seriously – Brett Ratner?)